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Why We Seek Relationship Closure After Breaking Up

The breakups we go through aren’t always smooth and pleasant. What’s more is that when the relationship ends, we have this uneasy feeling. You’re probably familiar with this. Most of us who have gone through a nasty break up then seek relationship closure.

The Reason Behind Our Desire For Relationship Closure

Closure is simply the act or process of closing something. It’s like reading the last lines of the last chapter of a book. Relationship closure can be defined in a similar way. We want to deal with the feelings we have towards a relationship that did not work out. We seek answers to questions like:

  • What did I do wrong?
  • What factor contributed to the end of the relationship?

When you analyze it deeply, the reason why we need the closure is because we want to make better decisions in the future. There might be aspects in us that we need to improve before that new love comes. We don’t want to make the same mistake over and over again. So, the desire for closure is something that’s normal.

Ways To Get The Relationship Closure We Want

There are different ways for us to achieve closure. The most obvious one would be to ask our former partner to resolve things together. This is not easy to do but here are some tips you can use:

  1. Make sure that you and your ex are both at a point where you can calmly talk about things.
  2. Time the talk perfectly.
  3. Be ready for what your ex is going to say.

The second way to achieve closure is through yourself. The first option won’t always be doable for most of us. If this is the case, you have to reach deep within you to assess your failed relationship in an objective way, from a bird’s eye point of view. Here are some tips to help you achieve this by yourself:

  1. Forget about what you did wrong in your past relationship. Focus on improving weaknesses you have.
  2. Change your perspective about the break up. Instead of looking at it with questioning eyes, look at it as a lesson that you had to learn the hard way.

Whichever route you take, the closure you’ll receive will help you reshape and rethink your future in a way that’s healthier. For more relationship advice, check out other blog posts we have here.