If your girlfriend or wife is talking to you about something important, and you’re present, but your mind is elsewhere, you can’t really consider what you’re doing as listening. You cannot be a good listener if you’re not paying attention. The most ironic of all is that plenty of us think that we are good listeners, even though we are not.
Become A Better Listener By Focusing On Making A Connection
When someone is talking, it’s a must for you to show signs that you are actually listening. Good eye contact is one good sign, another is nodding your head. These are all positive body language cues that suggest you are listening to the person who’s talking. A few others are as follows:
Mirroring is like imitating the other person’s behavior. But, what does this have to do with becoming a better listener? A lot, actually. Experts say that mirroring is a means of making that connection with the person speaking. Of course, you don’t have to follow the person’s every move. For example, if the person is using hand gestures as he or she talks, then you can do the same.
Of course, you have to ask questions when you are in a conversation. Communication doesn’t happen when it’s just one person talking. Asking questions is another way to make that connection with the person you’re with. If you ask questions that are connected to the topic, the person you’re with will know that you are paying attention.
If you reply appropriately or react appropriately during your conversation, it’s definitely going to tell the person you’re conversing with that you understand everything that you have just talked about. Just like the rest of the cues, this is also a good sign that you’re attentively listening and are actually interested in whatever you’re discussing.
It’s all about making that connection with the person speaking. And, you cannot fake these cues either. It’s hard for you to do everything mentioned above when you’re mind is someplace else. For more tips about self-improvement and improving relationships, read other posts on the blog.