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Tag Archives: dating

emotional connection AsianDate

How to Flirt: Making an Emotional Connection

Whenever you flirt or chat with a date (either online or in person), it’s always important not to “interview” your match by asking too many consecutive questions. Instead, you should try to lead the conversation in a direction that will make the emotional connection between the two of you.

The Best Technique For Better Emotional Connection

There’s a simple technique for better connecting with a prospective partner on an emotional level: respond to the emotional content of what they say, rather than the factual content.

For example, if your match says: “I went skydiving once.”

An example of a fact-based response would be: “Cool. My friend is a professional skydiver.”

An example of an emotion-based response would be: “That’s great. I like when people are adventurous enough to step outside their everyday comfort zone. How did you feel right after you jumped?”

When your match tells you something about herself, she communicates both factual content (i.e. that she went skydiving) and emotional content (i.e. she is adventurous and loves fun). If you respond with a fact about yourself (especially one that “one-ups” her story), it won’t make her feel like you are connecting. If you acknowledge that she is trying to share an emotion and lead the conversation in that direction, the two of you will build a much deeper connection.

People can often get this wrong. When we speak to each other, competition is natural. It connects people to each other and establishes power relationships. But when couples do it to each other, it feels cold and disconnected.

Take a look at the following statements someone may write to you. What’s the fact-based response you could give? What’s the better, emotion-based response you could give?

Example 1: “I traveled all by myself once to Spain for two weeks.”

Example 2: “The last book I read was a novel about a woman who is torn between two men.”

Example 3: “My mother always tells me that I’m too impatient, and if I’m more patient I will get more of what I want.”

Practice this technique and you’ll find that your conversations leave both of you feeling more connected.

For more tips like this, visit the rest of our blog.

online dating myths AsianDate

Four Online Dating Myths (And Why They’re Wrong)

Even though online dating has been around for essentially two decades now, it still seems mysterious to some. We’re here to debunk four myths about online dating that, for whatever reason, some people still believe.

Online Dating Myths You Should Forget About

1. Everyone lies in their online dating profile.

Some people are hesitant to make connections with others they’ve met online, as they’ve been warned time and time again that everyone on online dating sites chooses misleading profile pictures, exaggerates their best qualities and hides their worst ones. While it’s inevitable that some people are less than honest, it’s a much smaller percentage of the online dating population than many would have you believe. Most people are looking to establish a genuine connection, and they realize they need to be honest to do so.

2. Online dating is only a means to in-person dating.

Traditional thinking dictates that after a few conversations with someone online, you either need to meet with them in person or give up on them. Modern online daters, however, know that this logic is far from true. Many online daters get great pleasure from the feelings of camaraderie and connection that you can get just from maintaining an online relationship. It’s often more than enough.

3. People only resort to online dating after striking out offline.

“If you’re looking for women on the internet,” the thinking goes, “it must be because you couldn’t find someone in real life.” Obviously, this reasoning has several flaws. Online dating offers a wider dating pool, profiles full of information on romantic prospects, and the means to chat with lots of ladies at once. Compared to all these efficiencies, many daters simply don’t find in-person dating to be worth the time investment.

4. Online daters only care about physical appearance.

Well, maybe this stereotype applies to people both online and offline. But, if anything, online daters have proven themselves to be less superficial than their in-person counterparts. Imagine going out to a bar: You have no basis other than physical appearance to go off of when deciding if you want to start a conversation with someone. Online, you have a page full of information to read through to help evaluate potential matches.

While some people still believe these stereotypes, more and more are recognizing the legitimacy of online dating as they, and people they know, begin to find romantic success on the web.

For more advice like this, visit the rest of our blog.

attractive to women AsianDate

How To Make Yourself More Attractive to Women

It’s not uncommon for men to be at loss for what to say to women, and it’s no wonder. Women are often far from transparent with their reactions and emotions, so it can be tough to read whether she’s picking up what you’re putting down. Fortunately, we’re here to help. Here are three things you can say to women with confidence that they’ll be into it and you finally can go through life (and online dating) knowing that you are far more attractive to women than you’ve ever been.

You’ll Be More Attractive To Women If You Say This

1. “What do you think?”

You’ve probably heard a lot of people say that women like men who are decisive, and that’s often true. There’s nothing wrong with being the one to choose the restaurant you eat at together or the movie you watch. But women – just like men! – like to at least be asked. Even if she always defers to you, she’ll notice and appreciate that you value her input.

2. “Thank you” and “You’re welcome”

The first thing a woman will notice about you is your mannerisms, and the second thing she’ll notice is your manners. It’s important to be polite from the very start. In a world where Tinder swipes dominate, women value chivalry more than ever. Holding the door, taking her jacket for her and helping her carry things are all included in this, as well. And don’t forget to be kind to service industry personnel!  How you treat waiters and service staff says a lot about you as a person.

3. “Damn”

Weird, right? A psychological study at Northern Illinois University found that people who used this word while making an argument were found more attractive by onlookers. It makes sense, in a way: If you let go of a curse word when talking about something you care about, it reveals you to be passionate, intense and principled. Don’t swear gratuitously, though, and take it especially easy on the f-bombs.

Long story short? Women like when men say things that reveal attractive personality traits: caring, chivalry and passion.

For more tips like this, visit the rest of our blog.

dating topics AsianDate

Dating Topics You Can’t Go Wrong With

Typically in both online and offline dating, the first thing that draws your attention to someone is their physical appearance. After that, of course, the only way to turn an initial spark into a real connection is to start a conversation. Here are four go-to dating topics to discuss with women that will set your relationship on a right course.

Dating Topics You Need To Stick To If You Want A Guaranteed Good Start

Her friends

A women will reveal a lot about herself by the way she talks about her friends. Are they adventurous, outgoing and crazy? Or do they like to stay in and watch TV or read books? Most likely, her friend group will have a mix of both. Many aspects of a woman’s personality will be reflected in the other women she spends her time with.

Pop culture

When you’re meeting a woman for the first time, it’s unlikely that you have many common experiences, let alone shared acquaintances. Pop culture serves as a neutral common ground where you can establish similar interests, or learn about something unfamiliar to you. Sports and books are fair game, but it’s even safer to start with music and movies, which are generally more widely consumed.

Travel

Even if you or the woman you’re speaking with haven’t traveled much, the topic of travel opens up discussions of goals and future aspirations. A woman’s answer to What’s your dream vacation? tells you about her desires for exploration, relaxation or both. And if she has traveled, asking Where’s the strangest place you’ve ever been? gives her the opportunity to tell a story that will get you both smiling and laughing.

Animals

If you’re one of those guys that divides all of humanity into the categories of dog people and cat people, this topic will help you out tremendously. Or maybe you’ll meet a woman with a deep affection for her guinea pig, tortoise or snake. Regardless, women (like men) love talking about their pets, and, with any luck, the enthusiasm she has for the most important animal in her life will carry over into your conversation.

As you’re talking to her, make sure to read her verbal and physical cues. Not all women have the same interests, and they like to talk about different things. But if you can figure out what a woman is passionate about, you’re off to a great start in making a connection.

For more tips like this, visit the rest of our blog.