Saying “I love you” for the first time can be exciting, scary or maybe a little bit of both. Too often, these three little words are uttered for the first time too soon, or without enough meaning or at the wrong time or in the wrong setting. Make sure the first time you say I love you it is done right.

“I Love You” Done Right

There are a lot of times when you should not say “I love you” for the first time. You should not tell somebody you love them just because the other person said it first. It may seem like the right thing to do in the moment, but it will just lead to strained feelings in the relationship. If the other person says “I love you” and you just aren’t feeling it, it’s OK to simply say, “I’m sorry but I’m just not ready to say it back.”

Also, modern technology is a great thing. It makes our lives easier in so many ways but it shouldn’t be used for the special moment when you tell someone you love him or her the first time. That means, under no circumstances do you text, instant message or e-mail a person to say I love you for first time. True, everyone under the age of thirty believes that texting is a valid form of communication, and many even believe it is better than actually conversing face to face. That doesn’t matter. No matter what you feel about texting, you cannot say I love you for the first time by text. It’s immature and besides that, it takes away the emotion of the moment. Words on a screen can’t hold a candle to words that come straight from your mouth.

You will next need to decide when and where to say I love you for the first time. You could wait for a quiet moment at the end of a date. You could go see a movie and when you hand her the popcorn, whisper I love you in her ear. You could wait for a special moment – during the fireworks on the fourth of July, under the mistletoe on Christmas Eve, on his birthday or on the anniversary of your first date or first kiss. Whatever moment you choose, you will know in your gut if it’s truly the right moment to do it.

When it’s time to actually say the words, look straight at your loved one, making eye contact. If you are nervous you can start with, “There’s something I’d like to tell you.” Your loved one will be curious and this will be a good lead-in for you to get up the nerve to say what you have been thinking and feeling. Take a deep breath and say, “I love you.” If you are very lucky, the other person will respond, “I love you, too.” And if you are very, very lucky, you will get an “I love you” kiss, too!

For more advice like this, visit the rest of our blog.