While being in a happy relationship can make us feel like the whole world is ours, breaking up can feel like our whole world has come crashing down. There is something awful about losing someone you have loved, and the pain experienced can feel very real, almost hurting us physically too. However, we should not let the pain coming from our past hold us hostage and keep us from finding happiness again. How do you move on with your heart still broken, though?
The Right Time To Move On
If you just sit and wait for the pain to go away, there’s a chance you’re going to wait a very long time and slowly sink into depression. Conversely, if you push yourself to move on immediately, you will simply be running away from the pain, not dealing with it.
The best way to go about it is to allow yourself to experience the hurt and embrace the pain you feel, not ignore or try to suppress it. Then, pick up your pieces and continue living life a new and stronger person.
Letting The Wound Heal
Think of it like this: if you had been in an accident where you had sustained physical wounds, wouldn’t you spend some time in a hospital bed, suffering the pain and allowing the wounds to heal with tons of TLC?
After a while, though, the doctors would tell you that staying in bed can end up hurting your body, and they’d advise you to start making baby steps, to get up and slowly but surely get back to your everyday life.
The same thing can be said of an emotional wound. You will need all the help and care you can get from your friends, your support system – if you need to, even a professional. Then, however, you should push yourself to get on with your life.
Back Into The Dating Game
If your relationship was a long-term one, you will probably be little rusty at dating, but don’t worry about it. It will all come back to you slowly. Think about the endless opportunities you have now – so many interesting single people out there to choose from.
See flirting as a game – enjoy it, hone your skills and you’ll be surprised at how much fun it really is. You don’t need to be serious with every person you meet, be as committed as you feel comfortable being. Don’t hurry into another relationship trying to replicate your previous one. Instead, try to form relationships that are better than your former one. And treat your previous experiences as lessons, not defeats (read how to do it here).
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