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Tag Archives: online dating

emotional connection AsianDate

How to Flirt: Making an Emotional Connection

Whenever you flirt or chat with a date (either online or in person), it’s always important not to “interview” your match by asking too many consecutive questions. Instead, you should try to lead the conversation in a direction that will make the emotional connection between the two of you.

The Best Technique For Better Emotional Connection

There’s a simple technique for better connecting with a prospective partner on an emotional level: respond to the emotional content of what they say, rather than the factual content.

For example, if your match says: “I went skydiving once.”

An example of a fact-based response would be: “Cool. My friend is a professional skydiver.”

An example of an emotion-based response would be: “That’s great. I like when people are adventurous enough to step outside their everyday comfort zone. How did you feel right after you jumped?”

When your match tells you something about herself, she communicates both factual content (i.e. that she went skydiving) and emotional content (i.e. she is adventurous and loves fun). If you respond with a fact about yourself (especially one that “one-ups” her story), it won’t make her feel like you are connecting. If you acknowledge that she is trying to share an emotion and lead the conversation in that direction, the two of you will build a much deeper connection.

People can often get this wrong. When we speak to each other, competition is natural. It connects people to each other and establishes power relationships. But when couples do it to each other, it feels cold and disconnected.

Take a look at the following statements someone may write to you. What’s the fact-based response you could give? What’s the better, emotion-based response you could give?

Example 1: “I traveled all by myself once to Spain for two weeks.”

Example 2: “The last book I read was a novel about a woman who is torn between two men.”

Example 3: “My mother always tells me that I’m too impatient, and if I’m more patient I will get more of what I want.”

Practice this technique and you’ll find that your conversations leave both of you feeling more connected.

For more tips like this, visit the rest of our blog.

online dating myths AsianDate

Four Online Dating Myths (And Why They’re Wrong)

Even though online dating has been around for essentially two decades now, it still seems mysterious to some. We’re here to debunk four myths about online dating that, for whatever reason, some people still believe.

Online Dating Myths You Should Forget About

1. Everyone lies in their online dating profile.

Some people are hesitant to make connections with others they’ve met online, as they’ve been warned time and time again that everyone on online dating sites chooses misleading profile pictures, exaggerates their best qualities and hides their worst ones. While it’s inevitable that some people are less than honest, it’s a much smaller percentage of the online dating population than many would have you believe. Most people are looking to establish a genuine connection, and they realize they need to be honest to do so.

2. Online dating is only a means to in-person dating.

Traditional thinking dictates that after a few conversations with someone online, you either need to meet with them in person or give up on them. Modern online daters, however, know that this logic is far from true. Many online daters get great pleasure from the feelings of camaraderie and connection that you can get just from maintaining an online relationship. It’s often more than enough.

3. People only resort to online dating after striking out offline.

“If you’re looking for women on the internet,” the thinking goes, “it must be because you couldn’t find someone in real life.” Obviously, this reasoning has several flaws. Online dating offers a wider dating pool, profiles full of information on romantic prospects, and the means to chat with lots of ladies at once. Compared to all these efficiencies, many daters simply don’t find in-person dating to be worth the time investment.

4. Online daters only care about physical appearance.

Well, maybe this stereotype applies to people both online and offline. But, if anything, online daters have proven themselves to be less superficial than their in-person counterparts. Imagine going out to a bar: You have no basis other than physical appearance to go off of when deciding if you want to start a conversation with someone. Online, you have a page full of information to read through to help evaluate potential matches.

While some people still believe these stereotypes, more and more are recognizing the legitimacy of online dating as they, and people they know, begin to find romantic success on the web.

For more advice like this, visit the rest of our blog.

dating online AsianDate

What You Should Never Say to a Woman While Dating Online

Frankly, it’s hard to go wrong when you are dating online. Of course not every conversation will turn into a lifelong romance, but if you’re being yourself and not being too high-strung, you’ll generally get along with the women who have compatible personalities and interests to yours. There are, however, a few things you should never say to any woman you’re pursuing online. We’ve compiled them for you, in hopes that you won’t miss any opportunities because you turned someone off by saying the wrong thing.

When You Are Dating Online You Should Never Say This

1. “I’m still getting over my ex.”

A lot of people who try online dating are recently out of serious relationships, but there’s no need to advertise it. If you’re still at a point where you still need to bring up your ex in every conversation – even those with prospective romantic partners – then maybe you need to take a little more time off from the dating world.

2. “Why aren’t you replying to me?”

There could be many answers to this question. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk with you, and that’s fine. Just as likely, though, is the possibility that she hasn’t had a chance to write back to you yet. But by pestering, you come off as desperate and demanding. Pushing for a response never works.

3. “Hi.”

We’re not saying that you should skip greetings! Rather, we’re advocating for an upgrade on the one word “hi”s and “hey”s of the world, or at least an addition. Make your opening line a full one or two sentences, maybe something like this: “Hey! I couldn’t stop thinking about you yesterday. What’s up? :)” Friendliness and enthusiasm are key.

4. “Your really pretty.”

Not everyone can be a grammar expert or a Scripps National Spelling Bee champion. That said, it’s worth your time to consult a spellchecker. Obvious errors in your messages convey a lack of care in communication. She’ll wonder why she’s not worth the two minutes that it takes to re-read the otherwise-thoughtful message you wrote to her.

5. “Do you wanna sleep with me?”

Come on, man. You’re better than that.

For more advice like this, visit the rest of our blog.

online dating experience AsianDate

How To Make Your Online Dating Experience As Good As It Can Be

Many people prefer online dating to in-person dating because they feel less pressure and it gives them a chance to truly realize what they’re looking for. Others, however, go the other way, using the technology to do broad, quick, thoughtless searches for companions. Here are three ways to avoid falling into that trap of a bad online dating experience.

Online Dating Experience Is How You Make It

Be honest about what you’re looking for.

People participate in online dating for dozens of reasons. Some people are looking for a life partner, some people are looking for friendship, some people are looking for a purely physical relationship—and all of those things are fine! The problems arise when you lie to yourself (and others) about what it is you want from the online dating experience. Keep it real, and you’ll be much better off in the long run.

Avoid “algorithms.”

Some of the bigger dating websites out there claim to be able to mathematically pair you with people you’ll be compatible with. On AsianDate, we steer clear of algorithm-based matching because we know that not only do these services sometimes cost hundreds of dollars, but, truth is, they don’t usually work. If you’re looking for a “real” dating experience, turning to mathematical formulas is a step in the wrong direction.

Take the time to read profiles.

In a world where some people consider swiping right on their Tinder app to be a romantic experience, it can be easy to forget that the key component of forging a connection with someone is, well, actually getting to know them. Online dating offers the great feature of user profiles, which provide you with insight on personalities and preferences. Remember, people are more than their pictures.

What’s great about these tips? They’re all easy to do. Online dating has evolved into a rich, complex experience over the years, and there’s no reason you shouldn’t be able to engage with it in a deep, meaningful way.