The way we are wired and the pressures we face every day make us tense and irritable most of the time. May it be from our jobs, from our dating lives (or the lack of it), or from dealing with friends and family. When a potentially negative situation arises, we tend to blow up when our threshold for pressure has been reached. This does a lot of damage to our partners, friends, and even family members. But, it’s not too late to correct this habit with a simple 30-second technique that can save any relationship we have.
Save Any Relationship By Setting Aside 30-Seconds To Do This Method
To avoid becoming an explosive volcano when our balance is threatened, we need to aim for a calm and rewarded state. It helps us appreciate what we have and enables us to keep our negative emotions in check. There is a weird 30-second technique that can help us achieve this state. With constant practice, it can save any relationship from breaking:
So the first step is to breathe. Take in a lungful of air and exhale slowly. Breathing does two things. First, it creates an interruption to building up the tension and it allows the mind and body to pause before responding. Second, a physiological process occurs that helps us relax and actually changes how we feel about the situation. As the oxygen reaches our brain’s prefrontal cortex, our fight-flight-freeze response becomes regulated.
After pausing to breathe, this is actually the quick part where you identify your emotion. Is it anger, frustration, disappointment, jealousy, or any of the negative emotions? Labeling is not useless. It actually gets the mind and body to do two very important processes. First, it signals our prefrontal cortex to think and engage in rational thoughts. Second, it allows us to externalize. This way, we can process what we are feeling and not act according to emotional cues.
Reappraising just means asking yourself some questions. It mostly zeroes in on three things: your learnings from the situation, the things you can be thankful for despite the situation, and if this situation will really matter years from now.
Situations that can anger us may happen every day, especially in romantic relationships and non-romantic ones. But this 30-second trick can save any relationship, even those marriages that are on the brink of divorce. That is because it helps you to respond rationally to situations instead of giving power emotional responses. For more tips on how to make a relationship healthier, read other posts on our blog.